


Waiting on the other side

by Jupe



Series: Sylvix Week 2020 [5]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Angst With A Bittersweet Ending, Inspired by Orpheus and Eurydice (Ancient Greek Religion & Lore), M/M, Sylvix Week 2020 (Fire Emblem), Weddings, but we still get to see him, felix dies, myths and legends, this was painful
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:20:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26648902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jupe/pseuds/Jupe
Summary: A slightly adapted retelling of Orpehus and Euridice, starring sylvix
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Series: Sylvix Week 2020 [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1933255
Kudos: 3





	Waiting on the other side

**Author's Note:**

> Sylvain is orpheus in this, Felix is Euridice. sothis somewhat takes the place of Hades I guess?

Sylvain had waited for this day for so long, and finally it was here. At times he thought they’d never make it this far, but eventually they managed to win the war and return to an almost normal life. And with peace, him and Felix had finally been able to plan their wedding. Now that they stood at the altar, he was almost convinced that this had to be a dream. All of it certainly looked like it had in his dreams. They were located in an old chapel with high walls and stained glass windows that bathed the entire place in the most beautiful colours. The decorations themselves were subtle, mostly white flowers that had been picked out and arranged by Dedue himsels (And he really did an amazing job!). There were a few teal and burgundy red ribbons here and there, setting nice accents. There weren’t too many guests — Mostly just their friends and what remained of their families — but they both had wanted it this way.

A few times Sylvain wondered if he’d wake up any second now, but every time he looked over to Felix, who then gave him a reassuring smile and squeezed his hand, reminding him that this was really happening. His heart beat faster knowing that it wouldn’t be long until it would be official that they’d spend the rest of their lives together — something they’d known for quite some time now already. Throughout the (very lengthy) speech held by the Byleth herself, their hands were intertwined, a silent promise of what was soon to come. From this day on, they would never have to be without the other, no matter what would get in their way. Byleth now finally — _finally_ — looked at Sylvain.

“Do you, Sylvain Jose Gautier, vow to love and cherish this man, through good and bad, until death do you part?” It was hard to contain his tears of joy as Sylvain answered “I do!” with a shaking voice.

He took a deep breath as Byleth now directed the same question at Felix, hardly listening to what she was saying anymore. His focus was solely on Felix, who looked up at him with what had to be the softest look Sylvain had ever seen on him. His eyes were shining bright as he gave Sylvain a warm smile, and Sylvain could only hope that he would get to see much more of that look going forward. He would certainly do his best to make Felix smile at any chance he got. His lips curled into a wide grin as Felix repeated what Sylvain had said just seconds ago: “I do!”

When they exchanged rings, Sylvain was relieved to see that Felix’s hands were trembling just as much as his own. It was somewhat reassuring that they both seemed equally excited to finally share this moment. Despite their nervousness, they managed to somehow put on their rings without any bigger mishaps, and once they were done, the priest gave a content nod and smiled at them. “I hereby pronounce you husband and husband. You may kiss now.”

Sylvain didn’t waste another moment before he pulled Felix closer to kiss the man who was no longer just his boyfriend or his fiance, but his husband, and by now, he actually felt a few tears escape his eyes. Felix chuckled upon seeing them, gently raising a hand to Sylvain’s cheek to wipe them away, followed by yet another quick kiss.

The wedding party was truly glorious. Dimitri had insisted on paying for the wedding to ensure that it would be worthy of his two childhood friends’ special day. Felix refused to allow for him to pay for _all of it_ , and in the end they had managed to somehow find a middleway, thanks to Ingrid repeatedly glaring at them and saying that “they better not get into an argument over this, or else…” She never specified, but they all knew her well enough by now to have had at least a rough idea of what _or else_ was supposed to mean.

Their other friends had insisted on helping as well, and Sylvain almost couldn’t believe how it all turned out. Ashe and Dedue had made sure to cook the best food they ever made — Traditional food from Faergus with a twist of Duscur cuisine, which worked incredibly well together — and Mercedes made a large cake with Annette’s help — Which they’d made sure not to make too sweet, so Felix could be convinced to eat some of it as well.

For a location they had picked a small cottage, right in between their respective territories. The decorations here were much the same as they had been in the chapel, keeping up the white, teal and burgundy colours, with flowers everywhere. Candles on the walls served as a light source, creating a warm and cozy atmosphere. Towards the center of the room there was a small orchestra playing music just loud enough to underline the happy chatter of everyone with a soft tune.

However, what Sylvain loved the most about this day was seeing the smile on Felix’s face, that he didn’t even try to hide from anyone. After so many years of war, with Felix constantly looking concerned or irritated, it was nice to see him this happy. It was a sight Sylvain hoped to be able to see every day from now on.

Sylvain was reluctant at first when Ashe and Annette came and begged him to sing something. He hated the idea of leaving Felix’s side for even a minute.

“But Sylvain!”, Annette whined, “You just _have_ to sing! You’re known as the best singer in all of Fodlan, it would be such a shame if you didn’t let all of us hear you!”

“When you sing, even the birds stop to listen”, Ashe added, “I’m sure your singing would sway even the Goddess. It would only be fair to bless your wedding guests with your talent!” 

As much as Sylvain didn’t want to leave, he wasn’t exactly immune to all the sweet praise coming from his friends. Felix chuckled and squeezed his hand. “Go! You have the rest of your life to stare at me, a few minutes won’t make a difference. And _maybe_ I’d like to hear you sing as well.”

Sylvain sighed deeply. “Alright, alright. How could I not fulfill your wish, sweetheart?” He kissed Felix’s cheek one last time, grinning as the other man was visibly holding back from complaining about the nickname as Annette and Ashe dragged him towards the stage.

Sylvain was no stranger to having all eyes on him, although back in his teen years he hadn’t allowed anyone to hear him sing, not wanting it to be yet another thing he would come to hate because people would only pretend to like him for his talent. It had been Felix who one day walked in on him quietly singing to himself. He’d been incredibly embarrassed, expecting Felix to just scoff and leave, or perhaps tell him to stop wasting time by singing and go train instead. But none of that ever happened, and Sylvain had been quick to learn that, although he would never admit it, Felix seemed to enjoy hearing others sing. It had been Felix’s encouragement that finally made him feel confident enough to allow more people to hear him sing.

With time it had gotten easier to ignore the way his breath hitched for a moment whenever he looked around to see everyone focusing on him, but the feeling never quite went away. Even now he sought his husband’s — husband’s! — eyes to exchange one last encouraging smile before he fastened the grip around his lyre and let his fingers dance across the strings, the music accompanying his voice as it filled the otherwise quiet room.

He played one song, then another and then yet another — always urged on by the others to please just play one more song — before he couldn’t bear being away from Felix any longer. He gave a half— hearted apology as he left the stage to be taken by the orchestra again, hurrying back to his table with an easy smile on his lips. However, he soon came to realize that Felix wasn’t sitting at their shared table anymore. His smile made way for a frown as he couldn’t help but wonder where he went. Just in that moment Mercedes passed by him, and so he caught her arm. “Hey Mercie, do you know where Felix?”

Mercedes glanced back at the table with wondering eyes. “Oh, he’s not back yet? How strange.”

Sylvain raised an eyebrow. “Back from what?”

“Earlier he told me he’d get some fresh air for just a moment, but when I asked if I should let you know, he assured me that it wasn’t necessary because he’d be back before that. Seems like he left longer than expected after all.”

He should’ve known. With that many people around him for several hours, it was no wonder that Felix would need a break at some point. It may not be the worst idea for him either to get away from all the commotion for just a little while. A moment alone with Felix did sound rather appealing.

Sylvain smiled at Mercedes. “Thanks for letting me know! Guess I’ll go check on him and make sure no one stole him away from me,” he joked heading towards the door.

He stepped out into the night, the full moon bathing the area in its silver light. It had been a pretty warm day, almost too hot for Sylvain’s taste, but right now the wind made him feel almost cold. He looked around the nearby area, a small clearing in the middle of the forest, expecting to spot Felix. He was surprised to not see him anywhere. Assuming Felix had wandered off somewhere, Sylvain began to search for him. “Felix? Where are you, sweetheart?” Nothing. After a bit of searching, he saw a nearby bush slightly rustle and went to look behind it.

It took him a few moments to register that the shadow that was slumped over in the grass there was, in fact, Felix. Seeing him like that flooded Sylvain with worry and within seconds he was kneeling by his side, trying to help Felix sit straight. The other was drowsily looking back at him, his skin pale and covered in a cold sweat.

“What happened?”, Sylvain asked, voice thick with worry. Felix was mumbling something unintelligible before slumping forward again, his head resting against Sylvain’s chest this time. He hadn’t been able to make out what it was Felix had said, except for one word, but it was enough to make him feel sick.

“Snake” Felix had mumbled somewhere in between all that gibberish. His mind was immediately flooded with all the worst-case scenarios and Sylvain’s stomach dropped. _No_ , he had to make sure, had to prove himself wrong.

“Did it bite you?”

Felix gave a single weak nod confirming his darkest suspicion while one shaky hand grasped onto Sylvain’s shirt for dear life.

Sylvain screamed out for someone, _anyone_ to go get Mercedes, but he had no idea if he was even heard. He pulled Felix closer, cradling him in his arms, his own words turning into much of the same gibberish that had come out of Felix’s mouth just seconds ago, as if he had been the one bitten. He could barely make out his own words as he whispered something along the lines of _it’ll be fine. Mercie can fix this. You’ll be fine, just hold on_. But was he trying to comfort Felix, who didn’t even seem to register what he said anymore, or himself, his face wet with what he recognized as tears as he watched the man he loved quickly grow paler?

While Sylvain sat and prayed for help, the hand that had been grasping his shirt got weaker by the minute, eventually falling to rest on Felix’s own chest. He was struggling to keep his eyes open as the venom tore through his body. Mercedes arrived, somehow having found her way to them. Felix had already grown limp in Sylvain’s arms, and shortly after the healer confirmed what Sylvain had been dreading — He couldn’t be saved.

She put a hand on his shoulder, choking on a sob as she frantically apologized.  
“Sylvain, I’m so, so sorry. I wish I could help him. I wish I could do more. I’m so sorry!”

Sylvain’s eyes filled with tears as he clasped onto the man he loved more than anything in the world. “We didn’t survive a war only for a snake to take him from me.”, he sobbed. “How many enemies did he fight like it was the easiest thing in the world? Any of them could have killed him, but he survived. Felix always survived. He can’t die now. He _can’t_! Not like this!”

Mercedes didn’t seem to know what to say anymore. And how could she? There were no words that could take away Sylvain’s pain. No relief from the cruel reality that Felix had been taken from him just like that. Even if she had found the right words, Sylvain wouldn’t have been able to hear them anyway. In his mind there was nothing but one sentence, repeating over and over and over again.

_Your singing would sway even the goddess._

*****

Sylvain was dead set on his plan. All the pleading of his friends to _please be reasonable_ fell on deaf ears. He refused to live without Felix, not if there was a chance for him to get him back — However slim that chance may have been, however insane it seemed. He still clearly remembered the tales Glenn had told them when they were kids and based all of his hopes on one particular tale they had heard more times than they could count.

They would often sit in front of the fireplace within the Fraldarius estate, all cuddled up under several layers of blanket, listening intently as Felix’s brother told his stories.  
“Deep in the forests of Faerghus, there is a cave that no man dares set foot into. Word is that if you enter it, you will cross the border that separates our world from the world of the dead…”

For years up to this point Sylvain had been convinced that this was a mere tale invented by adults to prevent their children from wandering too far and getting lost. After all, they had been a bunch of curious kids, fast to get into trouble, and it would have been a typical thing for Glenn to do to try and scare them into being more careful. Had it not been for tales like this one, perhaps at least one of them would’ve died simply because they had been too reckless. And yet, in his desperation, Sylvain threw all reason out the window. He was quick to grab a map of Faerghus and circle all the caves he could find while everyone else begged him to reconsider. Their words didn’t get through to him.

In the dead of night he snuck out one night with his lyre, jumped on his horse and began his search to try and convince the goddess to give Felix back to him.

*****

There were far more caves in Faerghus than he would have anticipated, and most of them turned out to indeed be nothing more than that — caves. Once in a while Sylvain encountered a red wolf or a giant bear sleeping inside, but aside from that it seemed like he was just a madman searching for a pathway that didn’t exist.

 _Perhaps he should allow the next beast he came across to just eat him,_ he thought as he wandered into yet another cave. _If he couldn’t bring Felix back, he’d at least keep their promise so they could be together after death._

It was dark. Far darker than usual. It had to be the exhaustion, Sylvain decided. He was no stranger to the signs of sleep deprivation by now. Sometimes he could hardly sit upright on his horse, and his mind was a foggy mess. It didn’t exactly surprise him. After all, he’d been out for weeks now, spending most of his nights awake, shivering next to a campfire while his mind circled around Felix and how much he missed him. Sometimes he managed to cry himself to sleep by the time the sky was already becoming a light blue again, granting him at least a few hours of sleep. Even then, he dreamed of Felix, reliving the moment he died over and over again. There seemed to be now way for him to get even a moment without being reminded of the painful reality. All he wanted was to find Felix. If he managed to get him back, everything would be fine. Then, _he_ would be fine again, as well.

In addition to the darkness that seemed to swallow every source of light up entirely, Sylvain also felt a lot colder than he had in the caves before this one. For a second he considered going back to grab the additional coat he had taken with him, but then he decided that finding Felix was more important. If this cave was like the ones before it, he’d be out of here soon enough either way. However, the deeper he headed in there, the more he felt as if something was different from before, although he wasn’t quite able to pinpoint what it was yet. He followed a steep, rocky path that kept going further down, the walls almost too narrow for Sylvain to get through. It really seemed like more trouble than it was worth, and yet, he felt a need to keep pushing onward.

Finally he could see the walls getting wider. Sylvain squeezed through and was met with a more open space. The ceiling was a bit higher here, stalactites hanging down from it, meeting with stalagmites at the bottom. There was a sound of what seemed to be water dripping from somewhere, although Sylvain couldn’t determine where it came from. He walked closer, hearing every one of his steps echo. The air was damp and cold, causing him to shiver a little. To his surprise there seemed to be a few lit torches on the walls. He decided to follow them and was surprised to come across a river flowing not too far away from him. This struck him as odd. As far as he remembered there were no rivers nearby. Sylvain carefully climbed down the last bit of the path to investigate the river further. The closer he came, the stranger it all felt. By now his mind was clearer than it had been for days, and so he was convinced that his memory didn’t trick him — There was no place like this on any map of Faerghus. Most of the caves here didn’t reach this far down, and there certainly shouldn’t be a river. Sylvain had either wandered off much farther than he thought, or he discovered some entirely new place — Neither of which seemed very likely.

He followed the river for a while, until he came across what appeared to be an old wooden fishint boat. Its sides were covered in algae and the wood seemed to be splintering in some spaces. “Why would that be here?”, he mumbled to himself, slowly approaching. Sylvain stretched a hand out towards the boat, almost expecting it to be nothing more than a hallucination. And yet, his fingers indeed touched the rough, worn— out wood.

“You do not belong here.”, a frail voice behind him whispered, startling him. Sylvain spun around in shock, only to see a hunched figure. Their face and body were mostly obscured by a black hood, except for a pair of almost grey hands.

“I… I didn’t know someone lived down here,” Sylvain stumbled, taken aback by the sight of another person. The other chuckled.

“There is indeed no one living here. Except for you, that is.”

He narrowed his eyes. “What’s that supposed to mean? You’re right in front of me, aren’t you?” The figure just slowly shook their head, but didn’t seem to want to waste any time to elaborate.

“You have come here to find someone, have you not? Get in. I will take you there.” With that, they dragged their feet over the gravel of the riverbank and stepped onto the boat. Sylvain stood still as stone, unsure if he should trust this mysterious stranger.

The latter turned around to him. “What are you waiting for? Do you not wish to be taken to who you seek?”, they asked, tapping their foot like an impatient child.

“Where are you even taking me?”, Sylvain asked, still skeptical. There was an annoyed sigh.

“You humans _always_ must ask so many questions. I am taking you to your destination. That shall suffice as an answer for you. Of course, if you do not wish for me to take you, you are free to find your own way. Although I doubt that your mortal body would survive, trying to cross this river.”

“This is it. I’m going insane...”, Sylvain mumbled to himself as he gave in and climbed into the boat, wearily eyeing it. “You sure this won’t break?” He asked as he slowly sat down, careful not to shake it too much.

The figure quietly hummed. “This boat has not broken since the beginning of time, and it certainly will not break now. Human beings worry over such silly things…” They then grabbed the old oar and began rowing, causing the boat to start drifting across the water. It went surprisingly smoot, given the condition the boat was in.

Sylvain watched as the boat took him through tunnel after tunnel. Every once in a while there were short patches of open spaces, that allowed Sylvain to catch glimpses of plants he had never seen and strange shadow-like figures. He wasn’t able to see their faces, but couldn’t tell if they were just too far away, or if they didn’t have faces at all. There were a million questions Sylvain wanted to ask the figure — Who were these shadows? Was this where all dead people went? Did he really manage to find some gateway to the underworld? It was hard to believe, then again, it would offer an explanation as to why this place couldn’t be found on any of the maps and why it all felt so strange. Not to mention that Sylvain struggled to come up with another reason for some strange boatman down here. He still had so many questions, but only one of them truly mattered. “Will I… Get him back?” The figure was silent for a few seconds, before answering.

“That is up to you now.”

When they eventually docked, the boatman nodded his head as a sign for Sylvain to get out. As he turned to leave, a spindly, cold hand grabbed his wrist. He turned around in surprise.

“One last piece of advice for you”, the figure said, “You best stay away from the shadows. Sometimes, the darkness down here has a mind of its own, and I can assure you that it’s not something you would want to experience for yourself.”

With that, he let go of Sylvain, who gave one last nod before he wandered off. There were strange orbs of light flowing through the air and Sylvain made sure to follow them. He made it this far, and he certainly didn’t plan to get lost in the dark now.

The halls he walked through were winding and twisting, constantly separating into different directions. Sylvain certainly would have gotten lost, had it not been for a strange force leading him. He didn’t know if it was the right way, but what choice did he have? He definitely wouldn’t be able to find the way on his own, and he wasn’t one to complain for a bit of help, even if it came from weird supernatural forces.

His feet were growing tired and under other circumstance Sylvain might have given up already, but the hope of getting to see Felix again kept him going, until he finally entered a room that was covered in a strange green glow.

*****

The goddess looked far from how he would have ever imagined. Not that he had a concrete picture of her in his mind — He had never tried to come up with one. But Sylvain was certain that, no matter what he would have ended up with, it would not have been this — She looked almost like a child, with long green hair, sitting on a throne with her chin resting on a hand, her expression looking plain bored. Frankly, she seemed to be close to falling asleep while her eyes wandered across the shadows roaming around, watching over them. The shadows made way for Sylvain as he approached her, bracing himself for what would come next. The goddess’s eyes lit up with curiosity as she spotted him, suddenly sitting up straight.

“You certainly are not dead, are you now?”, she asked, tilting her head to the side.

Sylvain shook his head. “I’m still as alive as can be.”

She smirked. “Is that so? Then whatever are you doing here, where you do not belong?”

“You see, my beloved husband was bitten by a snake… He died right on our wedding day and I’m here to ask you to give him back to me.” He tried to keep his voice from quivering under the lingering gaze of the goddess before him, trying to be as polite as ever. He was, for once, thankful for all the boring noble gatherings his father had made him attend ever since he was little. They had prepared him well for this. And yet, the goddess didn’t seem to be impressed.

“Your lover has already taken his last breath… Whyever should I bring him back to life?” Sylvain bit his lip. If his tactic wasn’t working, maybe he had to step it up a little.

“I’m begging you… You are here for eternity. How long can a human’s life really be compared to that? I’m sure you would get him back before you even notice it.” There was no reply, just a flippant hand wave to go on. “Please have mercy. You have to know what love feels like. You yourself gave the gift of love to us, and I’m sure you intended for us to enjoy it… All I’m asking is for you to allow me to be with the one I love, who was taken from me far too soon… If I can’t have him back, I can’t go on living.Then you’d have not one, but two more souls to watch over here. I will do whatever you ask of me, just please consider giving him back to me.”

The goddess stayed silent, looking like she pondered what he had just said. Finally — _finally_ — she spoke again. “I am no stranger to who you are. Your singing is well loved by all living beings. I was told even the wind and birds stop, just to listen to you. I would like to hear that for myself. If you can do that for me, then I shall give in and allow you to lead your beloved back into the world of the living.”

Sylvain couldn’t help a smile of victory. All that was keeping him and Felix apart now was a bit of singing. It seemed like all his life he had been preparing just for this moment. He took the lyre he had taken with him when heading into the cave and began to play, his voice joining the instrument’s melody. Soon, all the shadows around him stopped roaming and watched in silence. It seemed as if even the river in the distance had stopped flowing as to not interrupt the sweet melody from carrying through the world of the dead, reaching everyone’s ears. Sylvain gave his all, pouring all of his emotions into the words that left his mouth, as he sang about love and loss and sorrow, an elegy spun out of the loss of his love with one single plea: To be given the chance to get him back. To be granted the life they had always dreamed about, the life they had put off for so long to fight a war and face death day by day. Never before had his voice sounded so clear, so strong, so determined. He sang until he was breathless, until everyone around was breathless, until there were no words left to sing. When his voice subsided, there was nothing but absolute silence.

Sylvain straightened his posture to look directly at the goddess, waiting for what she had to say. She seemed to be in a trance, swept away by the singing. Eventually she blinked a few times, then nodded with content. “Indeed, I understand now why everyone adores your music so much. I must admit, I almost wish to keep you here to sing for me some more… But no. Your time will come eventually, but you still have a life left to live. For now, I shall allow you to return to the living — With your love. However, there is one last thing I must ask of you.” Sylvain nodded, eager, willing to do whatever he had to in order to finally have Felix back. “You must not turn to look at him until you have both exited the cave and stepped into the world of the living again.”

“Yes, of course!”, he was quick to agree. If that was all he had to do, Sylvain would be able to keep his eyes off Felix for just a little longer. After all, he would then be granted an entire lifetime to admire his lover. The goddess gave a pleased nod, then pointed towards a group of shadows, calling one of them over to her. “You there! You shall be allowed to leave this place. Quick now, hurry up!”

Shortly after Sylvain could feel a familiar hand grasp his own. It felt colder than he remembered, but there was no doubt that this was the hand he had held countless times before. How could he ever forget how perfectly it fit into his hands? How the deft fingers intertwined with his own? How they felt when they squeezed his hand — much like they had not too long ago at the altar — to signal to him that _Felix was right there_? Sylvain felt the urge to turn and hug him, kiss him, at least look into his eyes — But he stopped himself. There would soon be enough time for him to do that. He uttered one heartfelt thank you to the goddess, who replied with a happy wave, before he tightened his grip around Felix’s hand to lead him back the same way he had come.

They didn’t talk for a while, words suddenly escaping Sylvain’s mind. He was preoccupied with the endless happiness he was filled with. Eventually, it was Felix who broke the silence. “Slow down.” The voice unmistakably belonged to Felix, despite sounding weaker, flatter than what Sylvain was used to.

“What’s wrong?”, Sylvain asked, reminding himself not to immediately spin around to check on his lover.

“My foot.”, Felix said, and as he didn’t receive a reply from Sylvain, he added “It hurts.” He sounded like he had a hard time forming words, like his mind still had some of its earlier dizziness.

“The snake bite still hurts, huh? I’m sorry, I’ll slow down. Just tap my hand when I’m too fast, you don’t have to talk if it’s too hard for you.” Felix gave an agreeing grunt and so they continued, albeit considerably slower than Sylvain would’ve liked. He wanted to get out of here. Wanted to breathe fresh air again, feel the sun tickle his skin and, most importantly, look at the man he loved.

Now that the silence had been broken once, Sylvain felt a little more comfortable with chatting away. “Once we’re out of here, let’s travel, just like you suggested a while ago. I know, I said I wanted to stay and take care of my territory, help his majesty out, try to settle the Sreng thing… But I don’t think that matters now. I realized I shouldn’t take this for granted, and I want to make memories with you that are truly worth thinking back to. How about we travel South? See what’s down there, you know? Although, on second thought, I think the heat will kill us both… Maybe across the sea? We’ll work something out.” He filled the steep way upwards with senseless rambling, just speaking whichever thoughts came to mind. Felix didn’t seem to mind, or at least he wasn’t giving any indications that he wanted Sylvain to stop.

When they returned to the boat, the ferryman still waiting, Sylvain greeted them like an old friend. “We’re here to return to our world!”, he cheerfully exclaimed.

“Much obliged.”, the figure replied, making space for the two to enter. “I see, you were successful at swaying the goddess in your favor. This has to be the first time she allowed for the dead to return.”

“What can I say? I really gave my all. Although we’re not quite there yet. She warned me not to turn around until we entered the world of the living.”, Sylvain explained while sitting down on his earlier space in the boat, helping Felix in as well as he could without turning around.

“I see… Yes, that sounds a little more like her... Better not slip up now, unless you want all of this trouble to have been for nothing.”

Sitting here, it was particularly hard for Sylvain not to let his eyes wander towards Felix. It felt like the worst torture imaginable, not being to able to catch at least a glimpse of his lover. And yet, he remained determined, his eyes locked straight ahead. In order to distract himself, he struck up another conversation with the ferryman, commenting on the few things they saw on their way aside from grey cliffs and water and asking all questions he hadn’t been able to ask earlier. The answers he received seemed rather evasive, most of it clearly being information not meant for the ears of the living, but Sylvain felt like he’d go insane if he had to sit in complete silence.  
Finally he recognized the area they entered as the same as he had come from. He uttered a last goodbye to the figure before grabbing hold of Felix’s hand one more time — reassured to know that he was, indeed, still with him — and went ahead to climb the last steps upwards, freedom in their grasp.

Sylvain could already make out the white glow of snow outside of the cave, along with the oh so familiar frigid Faerghus wind growing stronger the further he moved towards the opening. As soon as his boots touched the snow, he motioned to turn around to finally embrace Felix. The other’s warning call came too late, or perhaps his voice was still too weak and quiet. Or maybe Sylvain was simply too caught up in the thrill of the anticipation of laying eyes on his lover again to register what the man was saying. _Sylvain, wait! I haven’t stepped outside yet. Don’t turn around now_!

The moment Sylvain’s eyes landed on Felix, the latter was immediately pulled away by some unseen force. Sylvain tried to hold onto his lover, to grasp him and keep him from being taken away from him, but there was no use to it. Felix, too, reached out to Sylvain, in a futile attempt to grab his hand, his arm, his face, anything. Their desperate hands seemed to slip right through each other, Felix quickly turning into a shadow much similar to the ones Sylvain had seen in the underworld. It was as if he died once again right in front of Sylvain, who, again, could do nothing but watch as his lover was taken from him a second time. He almost expected Felix to scold him for being so reckless, to call him a fool one last time, but there was nothing like that. Instead, the words leaving his lips before he was taken back to where Sylvain had tried to free him from were one last confession of love, so faint that Sylvain may as well have only imagined it.

Not caring whether or not he got hurt anymore Sylvain stormed back to where the boat was still sitting, begging the figure to bring him to the goddess once more. “Take me back! Let me go back and talk to her again.”

“I am afraid I cannot do that.” There was something like pity in their voice.

Sylvain sank to his knees. “I’m begging you! I need another chance! Need it! I can’t be without him! I’ll do it right this time!”

“Dear child, the goddess already granted you a second chance. That is more than any other mortal to ever exist could say about themselves. But do not test the goddess’s patience. Do not go back again. She won’t be so kind a second time”

Sylvain’s pleas turned into sobs as he broke down, burying his face in his hands. The stones beneath his knees hurt against his skin, but he couldn’t be bothered to pay that any mind. Not when the pain he felt was so much greater, so much more painful than anything he had ever felt. More painful than when he was pushed down a well as a child, breaking his leg and being unable to do anything but wait for someone to come and heal him. More painful even than watching their old classmates die in a senseless war he had to fight against them. Nothing he had ever felt could compare to the agony that was swallowing him up in this moment.

Felix was gone. Gone for good. And it was all his fault. He was so close to bring him back, so close to achieving something that no one had ever done before him. The goddess herself had acted in his favor. And yet, he’d had to toss it all away, had to slip up right at the end.

Sylvain finally gave up and left the cave after realizing that his begging wouldn’t take him anywhere. He stumbled as his vision was obscured by tears. Now, as he mindlessly wandered the forest, they froze on his lashes, a clear sign that he shouldn’t be walking around like this if he didn’t want to freeze (although that didn’t seem like something he would have minded in that moment). He didn’t know where his horse had wandered off to, then again, who knew how long he had been gone? It was probably for the better that she had wandered off without him. Sylvain wouldn't be returning home anyway. He couldn’t. Being without Felix seemed like the worst possible future, one he had been trying to avoid for so long. If the price he had to pay to be reunited with Felix forever was nothing more than his own life, what was he even waiting for? It was about time he fulfilled the promise they had made as kids. That now seemed like an entire lifetime ago. Back when they were careless and free, no need to worry about wars being waged or the possibility of life being ripped from their hands just like this. Even then, as their childish selves, they had known that they couldn’t be without each other.  
This was not his decision to make, it had already been made by his past self a long time ago. He didn’t complain. Now more than ever did Sylvain know that life without Felix didn’t feel like living at all.

The deep growl appearing behind him made things a lot easier. On any other day he would have tried to run from the red wolf that was quickly approaching, or at least to defend himself. Today, he turned to face it, ready to feel the sharp teeth sink into his skin.  
The pain was like a relief. The blood leaving his body made him feel dizzy, numbness taking over his body and mind. In his last moment of consciousness, he whispered a faint _wait for me, Felix. I’ll be with you soon_. Then, everything around him went dark.

*****

The next thing Sylvain remembered was him wandering through pathways that were already familiar to him. This time he allowed his eyes to wander, desperate to find Felix somewhere among the shadows. His feet seemed to carry him on their own, past countless of empty faces that he didn’t care to look at twice. If they weren’t Felix, he didn’t want to see them.

When he stopped to look around after what felt like hours of no luck, trying to make up a plan to find Felix faster, Sylvain felt a grip tightening around his arm. He spun around, overjoyed as he finally saw the face he had been seeking for so long. Felix frowned at him, the hand on his arm sliding down to intertwine their fingers, while the other gently brushed across his chest where the wolf had sunk its teeth into him. “You fool… Letting a beast do that to you, just to…” Felix trailed off as his hand instead cupped Sylvain’s cheek. His voice was soft, and the small perk at the corner of his mouth told Sylvain all he needed to know. “The lengths I go to, just to be with you, huh?”, he whispered back, his forehead resting against Felix’s. Felix gently shook his head, a low chuckle rumbling in his throat. He didn’t say anything in return. Instead, he finally connected their lips, making Sylvain feel like the air was sucked out of him entirely. How many times had they already kissed like this? It should have been routine for them by this point. And yet, nothing could possibly compare to the endless relief of being reunited with Felix, along with the assurance that now there was nothing that could separate them ever again.

**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact: Did you know that Orpheus was also a part of the argonauts (The guys with the golden fleece)? Don't know what you're supposed to do with that info, but I thought it was kinda cool. Maybe you've noticed, but I'm very much a mythology nerd :^)  
> Also, I really couldn't decide which myth to pick for this, so you can probably expect more greek mythology AUs in the future!
> 
> Anyways, if you have some time to spare, why not drop by on Twitter and tell my beta (@/punchtheocean) thanks for being such a huge help with turning this into what it is now?


End file.
